Baby Number 2

Don’t get excited, I’m NOT pregnant!

One of my close friends had a little girl just over a week ago.  She has a little boy 3 weeks older than Mini M

It has got us talking about whether we want another child

A lot of our friends are always asking when are we having another

I find it really annoying!

I feel like a terrible person when I tell them “not any time soon”

I don’t even know if I want another child

Does that make me a bad person?  A bad woman?

Once you have one child why does everyone assume you want to keep having more?!

a stork carrying a baby

I love Mini M with all my heart.  I love spending time as a family together.  We also have enough money to do things as a family

I know money isn’t everything but I want Mini M to be able to do things and for us to be comfortable.  I don’t want to work just to pay bills.  We couldn’t afford to have 2 in nursery!

I want to enjoy Mini M growing up, it’s happening so fast

I’m not taking anything a way from people who have more than one child either.  Part of me is envious of how they manage, there are days I struggle just with one!  It’s a personal choice.  It’s about what makes you happy.  It’s about what makes you feel complete as a family

I have a brother and Mr M has a brother and a sister, so neither of us come from single child families.  I do worry that if we only have Mini M he will miss out on that bonding experience of having a sibling, but I also know that’s not a reason to have another child.

I also had a pretty traumatic labour with Mini M and I don’t feel that I can go through that again at the moment.  I know that in the grand scheme of things that’s a brief moment in time, but it’s one I don’t want to repeat in a hurry.

We had a long discussion about whether we want baby number 2.  Mr M doesn’t want another child at the moment but his reasons are purely practical and financial.  I think he would like another one once Mini M turns 3.

We agreed that we will discuss it again when Mini M is 3 and see how we feel.  We also discussed that if we don’t have another by the time Mini M is 5 we won’t, we don’t want to be having a child too close to our 40’s

Who knows what the future will hold but at the moment we are happy being a family of 3

Mr M, Mini M & Me

Our family

Do you have a big family?

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8 comments

  1. Elaine Livingstone says:

    Nothing wrong with having an only child, you only have one husband/wife and nobody ever queries that. 1 or 21 as long as they are loved and wanted, warm and fed, then that is the right number.
    I always wanted more ( yes I know I have 5) but the world was a different place one generation ago before Maggie Thatcher brought in the right to buy, privatised companies and families have higher expectations for material goods than I ever did.

  2. Farmerswifeandmummy says:

    I think there is a lot to be said for being happy with what we have. I’ve spent so long being obsessed with babies that it feels a releuf just to enjoy what I’ve got now. Our 4yr gap wasn’t planned but in hindsight it was the right thing. We get 15 free hours at nursery, she’s more independent etc but if G hadn’t happened we would have had to be happy.
    I’m an only child and really wanted Boo to have a sibling but it is personal choice and, after what we went through, I never ask people if they’re having another as, I feel it is like asking how much they have in their bank account. Great post and what a lovely family 🙂

  3. Kaye says:

    I completely empathise! My first is 17 months old and I feel like everyone around me is constantly waiting for me to announce a second pregnancy but in just bit ready! I want to enjoy him first and I want to be comfortable (financially). I also am not eager for the stress of worrying about an unborn child. I’m pretty sure I want more children but just not yet!

  4. mummymelton says:

    I feel exactly how you do, I want to enjoy my little man just now, he’s still my baby and changing so much. It’s important you are ready and feel ready xx

  5. mummymelton says:

    Aw thanks! Great way of putting it too, I hadn’t thought of it like that, people wouldn’t dream of asking that! There’s 4 years between me and my brother, I think my parents feel it was enough of a gap for me to be a bit older but we are both really close and always have been, it’s not too much of a gap xx

  6. mummymelton says:

    This is so true! The thing I want more than anything is for Mini M to know he is loved and for him to be content & happy. Whilst I want to give Mini M the best I also don’t want him to think he can get anything he wants. I want him to learn the value of things. My mum & dad always did their best by me and my brother but if they couldn’t afford something they told us and we had to accept that xx

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